I spent the weekend in Milwaukee and Antioch, IL for my cousin Eddie’s wedding. Great times were had by all, but the trip home was an ordeal.
I could have sworn I heard that blades less than 4 inches were allowed on flights and the mini Swiss Army knife I keep on my keychain would be fine. Turns out you’re only allowed to bring on scissors with blades less than four inches. Knives are still banned, so I lost my dull two inch knife.
The flight left close to on time, but as we approached Philly we had to wait about a half hour to land. I lost count of how many times we circled the airport.
The flight wouldn’t have been too bad except for the two Ivy League profs in the seats behind me talking so loud the whole plane could hear them. Not only that, but they were having the most boring conversation on Earth. (Parents are pushy when their genius kids don’t get in to Princeton. Who knew?)
We landed and went down to the Terminal F baggage claim and there was a huge group of passengers waiting for their bags. Something was wrong with their system and none of the bags were making it to the terminal. Every few minutes a bag or two would come up on the conveyor belt, so it was about 45 minutes before we got all our luggage. But we were in luck! The shuttle bus to the economy lot just pulled up and we ran to catch it.
The bus pulled away but at the last minute it stopped and let us on. Our luck had turned.
For the worse.
I noticed everyone on the bus was wearing airline uniforms. We were on the bus to the employee lot, which looks exactly like the economy lot bus except it says “Employee Lot” on the front. We only saw the back.
We rode all the way to the secret place where pilots, flight attendants, sky caps, cashiers, and ticket agents park their cars and then had to wait a few minutes while the drivers changed shifts. I asked the bus driver if he could drive us over to the economy lot, but he said no. We had to ride back to the airport and then walk through it again from departures to the Terminal A baggage claim. doh.
We finally made our way back and got on the right bus. The bus was empty since we were at Terminal A, which gave us front row seats for the grand finale of this crazy day. By the time the bus picked up passengers from C it was completely full. We passed Terminal D and the bus driver briefly opened the door to tell the waiting passengers there would be another bus in 2 minutes. We drove to Terminal F, where I once again remind you is home to the faulty baggage claim system.
The driver opened the door again to tell the waiters another bus would be there soon when all of a sudden people started flooding on to the bus. Some European travelers were ticked about having to wait two hours for their bags and a shouting match erupted between the bus driver and the people trying to get on the bus. He refused to go and they refused to get off. Everyone on the bus started yelling at our European visitors to get the hell off the bus and listen to the bus driver.
Finally, the bus driver let them stay as long as they got behind the yellow line. They ended up coming into the middle of the bus where we were. Words were exchanged between them, the passengers, and the bus driver (over the intercom) for the duration of the ride.
Oh well, that’s the story of our trip from MKE to PHL. It took us about 3 hours from when we landed to when we got home.