Pranking the RIAA

The RIAA have been contacting downloaders, so it was inevitable the downloaders would start contacting them.

JH: Hello. I just downloaded some illegal MP3s and my friend told me that the RAII is going to sue everyone who downloads music. What should I do?

RIAA: The best advice I can offer you at this moment is to go to and you can learn there how to uninstall your peer-to-peer software or file-sharing service.

JH: But I don’t have a pee service. Someone just e-mailed me a song and I listened to it. Am I going to jail?

RIAA: Sir, I don’t know. I’m not in a position to offer you legal advice on this.

JH: Legal advice? Do I need to get a lawyer?

RIAA: You might want to. As I said, your best possible route is to go to Beyond that, I’m not in a position to offer you additional legal advice.

JH: Can I write a check to someone?

RIAA: Has your service provider told you that you’ve been subpoenaed?

JH: A penis?

RIAA: [Long pause] What?

Read the rest of the crank call.